It Is OK To Cry

When you see someone who is grieving crying don't stop them.  It is therapeutic to cry.  It is a release of pressure building inside our heads and it relieves so much stress.  It is ok for us to cry.  It is also ok if you don't know what to say to us.  Really!  A hug, unspoken words from the heart, or just being held as you cry can go much further than any amount of words that are spoken.  Rich is always trying to comfort me when I cry.  He said to me the other night, "I am out of words...I have told you everything I know".  I told him...just hold me.  I don't need words.
I have many friends who are grieving many losses.  But it is important to remember that the loss of a human being is not the only time we go through the grieving process.  True!
Some people grieve at the loss of a job.  This can be voluntary or involuntary, even retirement can bring on a form of grief.  It is a complete change in what we have known all our life.  It is a loss of routine.  Until we fill that it is sometimes difficult.
Most people grieve over a lost relationship, be it divorce or break up.  A divorce will also bring lots of anger with it many times because of the legal process that must be followed.  But nonetheless a grieving process must be gone through for a love has died.  If there are children shared this is one of the most difficult to get through because you constantly see your loss in the child and in the physical person when dealing with your child's visitation schedules.
Many grieve over a loss of a pet.  In today's World more than generations in the past, we have fur-babies.  They are not just pets they are members of our family.  For those who are elderly or those who have no spouse or children at home that pet is much more than a pet.  When that animal gets its' wings it can be devastating to the one who lost it.
People who endure nature's tragedies like a fire or tornado or flood.  People who lose the life they have known or their home.  This is extremely difficult for the person who may have lost a loved one at the same time.
There is another "special" situation of the grief some suffer when multiple members of the family are lost at one time.  9/11 had many of those situations.   Families on airplanes and they are lost together.  For those left behind this can be unbearable causing further tragedy.
We also grieve the loss of friendship.  Sometimes in life we have to go in a different direction than our friends do.  This could be for many reasons.  But, it is a loss that many times has a grieving process with it.
College students are an increasing percentage of suicides and it is important to understand why.  These students have left, in most cases, the home they have known for 18 years, the school they have known for 13 years to move out, live on their own, take care of their laundry, cooking, and be responsible.  Increasingly our kids are not ready for that because we as adults, are not preparing them for it.  We want them to need us and to be with us.  And we as parents grieve when our children leave us to step out on their own.   It is important to remember that our jobs as parents is to create strong adults to lead us into the next decade not return to live with us for it, or worse, not be here to share it with us.
College students need support, not helicopter parents, support.  They need to become adults and know we are there to help them transition.
These are some of the many times we grieve and it is ok to let us cry.  It is ok to cry if you are in one of these.  Sometimes those tears are joyfull, sometimes not.  But no matter they are therapeutic to the body.