Tonight I became upset at a comment left on a post of a former student of mine. She is really struggling and from what I can gather from other posts she is suffering from an addiction of some kind. Her comment tonight was how terrible her life is and how she just wants to die but can't get that to happen either. I quickly responded with how beautiful a person she is and don't give up. Shortly after someone posted how she should just quit bringing drama on that she continues to bring it into her life. How dare you person I don't know, tell her that! Are you perfect? If she is suffering from an addiction then help her don't kick her while she is down. How ridiculous. This post is a cry out for help and all you did was tell her what she didn't need to hear.
I remember as a young girl my grandmother faithfully watched Days of Our Lives. I didn't know what it was at the time but as I became a teen it is what all the girls watched when they got home since the invention of the VHS recorder. (dating myself aren't I?) Anyway, I remember talking with my grandmother one day and she explained to me that the day her house burnt to the ground she never again watched that show. I asked her why, all the while thinking how silly that was. She explained to me that she had suffered such drama in her life she no longer needed to watch it on TV. Still I didn't understand until I went through my separation and divorce from Jared's dad. NOW I UNDERSTAND. That is when I no longer watched that show ever again. I had enough drama in my life I certainly didn't need to watch anymore.
I again experience this. I enjoyed 20/20 mystery and Dateline mystery shows. I don't any longer. In fact it goes far beyond just that. I can't even make myself watch any show with violence. I have tried. I just find myself turning away or changing channels. This is frustrating on one level because I used to enjoy some of these very shows with Jared and Rich. Shows like 24 or Hell On Wheels. I just can't stomach them. My anxiety level skyrockets and I begin to get physically ill.
Today I realized that there are a lot of these shows on. I almost feel like the only thing I can watch is Nickelodeon....lol, but I fear Batman may be too much. I find this on Facebook too. People are mean! Not a big Taylor fan but Why You Gotta Be So Mean?
I read an article today on the 5 kinds of friends we have during grief. One was the vanishing friend. The ones that just disappear because they don't know how to process our grief and we no longer fit into their life. I think in my young friends life I would hope this "mean" girl becomes one of those disappearing friends. Trust me "mean" girl we can beat the hell out of ourselves we certainly don't need any help with that. We need help picking ourselves up and having someone there to catch us when we stumble or fall. We don't need someone to shove us down a flight of stairs.
What I am saying is not only grief related it is life related. In life we need to learn to identify the drama and those who weigh us down with it. Stop focusing on the little things and making big thing out of them. Surround ourselves with love, spirituality, and kind people. Remember that it could be you that saves a life without knowing it. It could be you simply saying Good Morning to a stranger passing you in the post office that is on their way to end their life and a kind word changes their outlook on life. It could be a phone call or a text message to just say Hey thinking of you, how are you?
Life is short, love each other.....remember what we learned from Thumper as children, if you can't say anything nice, don't say nothin at all.
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