Back Home

I arrived back home yesterday afternoon.   It was a bit emotional for me but life must go on.  It was hard leaving Kingston Springs in one way, but in others it was easy.  I did hold it together but it wasn't easy, as we headed to the airport early in the morning for the first flight out, the same that Jared and Poco and I left on a nearly a year ago to begin our new life.  I got to spend time with old friends, new friends, and relationships brought together by Jared.  I wish he had chosen a different alternative, but he accomplished one of his goals and that was to bring people together for a great cause.  That cause is suicide prevention and he brought a special gift to my life.  A young lady he called his bestie has now become my right hand in this crusade.  In fact all credit must be given to her for me not to be curled up in the fetal position in the corner of my bedroom right now.  Her drive and ambition reminds me of someone years ago....me.  Maybe that is why Jared was so fond of her.
I saw hurt in so many eyes this past week.  Young adults that knew nothing to say but greeted me with a hug.  Some greeted me with tears of pain.  I told them all that tears are fine as long as there are some happy ones there too.
I had dinner my last night there with our former neighbors. It was extremely emotional for me.  That is where Jared and I had our last dinner before leaving to move.  It was so warm yet hard.  Our neighbor and Jared were so very close.  He had raised girls so I think he really enjoyed Jared to have some guy time.  We cried together and shared stories and just enjoyed one another.
It was empowering to travel alone and when I arrived back here I think I am a new person.  I think I am much stronger and much more driven.
Rich informed me that he will be traveling quite a bit in the next few weeks for work and next week our sweet fur-baby Zoe comes home so she and I will get lots of cuddle time.
I talked to Jared today and told him how I really felt him near me last week and it was as if he were next to me when I heard him say, "I am always near you".
I really wish I has my baby back on earth with me.  But I see his beautiful eyes and sweet smile everywhere!
I have yet to break down from traveling but it will happen.  For now....I must focus on the week ahead.